Monday, September 10, 2012

BDSM: Part I, The Real 411

I'll be taking my sister to a university hospital for out-patient surgery on Wednesday and will be spending much of the day at the hospital without a computer. I'll respond to your comments as soon as I can.



In what was billed as an exclusive one-of-a-kind BDSM workshop specifically geared toward writers’ needs, eight intrepid erotic romance authors gathered at a New York hotel during a mid-August weekend to get first-hand information from renowned Sexologist Dr. Charley Ferrer.

We were not disappointed.

First, the vitae:

Dr. Charley, as she is known in the Community, holds a Masters in Counseling Psychology, a Doctorate in Human Sexuality, and certification as a Clinical Sexologist and Erotologist. She’s a TV/Radio host and producer, award-winning author and sex expert for Fox News Latino.

She has also “outed” herself as a practicing Dominant.

So she knew whereof she spoke.

It will take several blogs to cover our weekend and what we learned and experienced regarding the subject of BDSM, so please feel free to return to this site often.

An overview:

We met Dr. Charley’s assistant, Alison, who has been in a submissive relationship for about a year. Alison freely shared her experiences throughout the weekend. As well, Rev. Dr. Matthew Scrivens offered a session on Serial Killers and Mental Health Disorders to help us write more vivid villains. Dr. Matthew, who holds a Masters in psychology and Doctorate in religion, has worked with murderers, rapists and teen sex offenders. He’ll be guest-blogging here in the near future.

Over the next three full days, we

·   listened raptly as we were led through the course.

·   asked questions which were fully and honestly answered.

·   watched demonstrations of several forms of Edge Play, such as Electrical Play (also known as Violet Wand Play) and Needle Play.

·   visited Paddles, a public BDSM Club whose owner, Michael, took us through the adjoining private club, Pandora.

·   practiced flogging.

·   enjoyed excursions to Purple Passion (sex-toy store) and Leathermen’s Fetish Shop.

In future blogs, I’ll expound on how what I learned about the BDSM Community differed from what I “knew”  about misconceptions that creep into our writing, about what we saw and heard and felt at the Club.

But for now, let me put in a plug for Dr. Charley’s book, “BDSM for Writers”. She also wrote “BDSM: the Naked Truth”, geared to non-writers, as well as several other non-fiction books on the subjects of sensuality and sexuality.

Oh, and I can plug my fellow Ellora’s Cave authors who shared this mind-boggling weekend with me and are/will be blogging about their own view of things:

·        Kathy Kulig

·        Francesca Hawley

Please, feel free to comment on my posts. I’m new to blogging, so I welcome your thoughts and observations.

5 comments:

  1. Can't wait to hear all you learned, Cris. Good luck with your sister.

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  2. Ditto to Amber's post. Okay, I may shock you, but I was in a light bondage relationship before I got married and was really into it. Very exciting and really heightened the experience. Phew - a memory just went by. Gotta hike up the air conditioning.

    Kinda jealous I didn't get to go to the workshop. Now I'm going to look for a future one. Not that I can write like you! Purely research - :)

    Hope Sis comes through well.

    Smoochies

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  3. Oh, this sounds like a wonderful weekend. I have no doubt the three of you had a great experience. I can't wait to hear the nitty gritty details.

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  4. Very cool! Can you post a link to the BDSM for Writers book? Sounds great ;)

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  5. Thanks for commenting, ladies!

    Shoshanna, if you click on the appropriate link in the text, it takes you to the Amazon site for each of Dr. Charley's books. The graphic doesn't connect.

    Kathye! You never told me you were a first-hand resource to answer questions. Baaaad girl.

    As for my sister, I posted a detailed comment about her treatment on my Facebook page.

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