Wednesday, August 28, 2013

FIRST THOUGHTS ON SECOND BDSM WRITERS CONFERENCE


     In a word, Yee-hah!
     Okay, so that’s undignified for a professional writer. But holy moly, what fun we had at the second BDSM for Writers Weekend Workshop hosted by internationally renowned Sexologist Dr. Charley Ferrer. Some highlights:
     * Meeting the erotic romance writers - all women this year - from Massachusetts, Rhode Island, New York, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Virginia and Florida (might have missed a state here or there) who came together to learn and research.
     * Guest speakers who expanded our minds with their commentary and demonstrations: the estimable Laura Antoniou celebrating the 20th anniversary of the release of her landmark “Marketplace” series, with her droll sense of humor and amazing knowledge of the BDSM lifestyle. Cassandra Park, who talked about different spanking and discipline methods as well as fantasy and role playing and using “pervertable” everyday household items. D.L. King, who suggested a list of movies that incorporated real-life BDSM details which raised them above the average male-centric “porn” flicks, as well as BDSM non-fiction and other areas of research. Traveling Fool and his partner, who demonstrated the mysteries and pleasures of the violet wand. (This blog from October 2012 describes how I reacted to my first violet wand experience at last year’s conference. This time was even better.)
     * Watching some “newbies” find their inner Domme or latent sub or kinkster tendencies.
     * The two husbands who came to the City with their author spouses then joined in the fun at Paddles, the longest-running BDSM club in New York City, and left with smiles on their faces and ideas in their heads for upping the intensity of their home life.
Trying out a schoolgirl pose
    * Wearing my new pleated leather mini-skirt on Friday night for the Back-To-School party hosted by Dom Sub Friends, a BDSM education/ support group. Special thanks to Sir Viktor for giving me a taste of his flogging expertise.
     * The amazing demonstration of Dr. Charley’s expertise in fireplay, which we all agreed was mesmerizing. And totally safe because of that expertise. Did you know that a flame pulsates to a heavy music beat because of vibrations in the atmosphere?
      * The hands-on class Dr. Charley gave at Paddles on Saturday wherein the authors had lots of willing subjects on whom to practice their new flogging skills.
     * Seeing for ourselves the sheer range of idiosyncrasies available under the aegis of BDSM, such as the naked man who reveled in being handcuffed into the inside of a full-length birdcage and then being subjected to tickling and scratching; the pair of women who were horizontally suspended by artistic ropework then tied together by their hair; the masochist who enjoyed CBT (having his genitals tied tightly then abused), and more.
     * Channeling my inner Domme in my snug, diagonally-zippered sheath when a supplicant pointed to his bare chest and begged, “Would you please apply my nipple clamps for me, Mistress?” and tossing a casual “No” over my shoulder as I strolled away.
     * Being approached by a man who said “I don’t have a foot fetish, but I’d be honored to massage your feet” and then at my nod, seating himself on the floor in front of my chair, he proceeded to remove my silver sandals and place both my feet directly on his face.
With Ralph Kramden of The Honeymooners
     * Oh, and I couldn't resist, as we were walking to the meeting place from our hotel, stopping at the statue of bus driver Ralph Kramden ("To the moon, Alice!") in front of the Port Authority Building.

     Truly, this workshop was a weekend well spent for all of us who want to write more realistic BDSM stories. And next year will be even better. Look for the link to register for a greatly expanded 2014 BDSM Writers Conference to go live in early September so you can register early. The Twitter hashtag is #BDSM_WC
    And please feel free to leave a comment if you've ever been to a Dungeon or are interested in BDSM. It's fun!
~~ Cris Anson

23 comments:

  1. I LOVE these posts. Thank you so much for sharing, Cris! It sounds like a wonderful weekend.

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    1. I'm happy to share, Nina. The more people learn about BDSM, the less scary they find it.

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  2. Am enjoying your posts on bdsm for writers, Cris!

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    1. Thanks, Debra. I love learning about BDSM because my books will be richer for the knowledge I'm absorbing.

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  3. Well, Cris! You beat me to the blog report. :) Yes, there was fun had by all and I'm trying to get well enough to put all my notes together and write some new realistic BDSM into my current WiP. Can't wait for 2014. I loved the fire play which I took part in and next time try more. I have to throw my 2c in too about the guest authors--they were wonderful speakers!

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    1. I forgot to ask--did the picture I took with you at Paddles in the cuffs come out, or too dark?

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    2. Thanks for commenting, Gray. I can't wait to hear what you have to say about the weekend. It was a great learning experience for all. And yes, the photos came out, I'll probably use one or more to illustrate a subsequent blog.

      It was wonderful to spend so much quality time with you and I hope to see you at next year's BDSM Conference!

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  4. I'm always happy to hear that authors learned something at a conference and came back re-energized. I'd like to see something like this and will at the Wicked Weekend... but I'm still a newbie!

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    1. I know you'll enjoy the Wicked Weekend and come back smiling, Melissa!

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  5. I love these posts! Please could you share the list of movies that were recommended for those of us who live outside the US and have less opportunity to go get all this research you guys have access to! You're so lucky!

    Thanks for sharing!

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    1. Hey Amanda, that sounds like another blog subject. I'll make a list and add what links I can find. Thanks for the idea!

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  6. Sounds like you had an awesome time, Cris. This workshop weekend is a great learning experience and great fun. It was such a benefit to my BDSM books. Can't beat this type of 'hands on' research. ;) can't wait for next year!

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    1. We missed you this year, Kathy. Everyone said hello and looks forward to next year.

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  7. That summed it up nicely Cris! It was great to meet you, and I will surely see you next year! If you have photos of Rich and I, I'd love to see! laci_paige@yahoo.com

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    1. Hey Laci, ditto! I do have a couple of photos that turned out and I'll email them. See you next year.

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  8. Who'd I miss from RI? Actually, I'm disappointed I missed it all. I've love to join it next year.
    Thanks for continually sharing your BDSM posts. :)

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    1. Amber, I'd love to see you at next year's con! Thanks for the kind words. See you at Romanticon??

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  9. Cris,

    It was such a pleasure having you join us again this year for the BDSM FOR WRITERS 3-Day Intensive Workshop. By next year, you will be a major veteran of the event. You know what they say, three times a charm! Plus, you’ll be speaking at next year’s event when we turn into a 4-day conference--BDSM WRITERS CON. Yahoo!

    I love the fact that participants took so much from this event. It was my dream and goal to provide realistic education to authors and the general public in a manner that helps you embrace nuances of this uniquely erotic lifestyle in a way that’s comfortable for you personally and which will help you improve your craft. From my count, all the authors at last year’s BDSM FOR WRITERS event have published at least two new books each. And one received her first book contract in BDSM novel. Love being a part of that!

    Each year the conference gets better and better—and bigger! Smiles. Next year, we’ll also be hosting our first annual BEST BDSM Book of the Year Award Ceremony. Winners will be selected from the book contest we are hosting. Check here for more information on how to submit your entry: www.bdsmforwriters.com/BOOK_CONTEST.html

    AND what’s even more amazing is that we have publishers who will be providing our Frist Place Winners with an actual Book Contract! (yep there will be more than one winner and book contract offered.)

    Gray and Laci: it was wonderful sharing the weekend with you. (And your hubby too Laci. Please give him my regards.) Look forward to doing so again next year. We’ll have to go out for drinks the night before.

    Melissa: everyone starts somewhere. Join us next year. I’ll also be attending the Wild Wicked Weekend, look forward to meeting you then. Can’t wait to return to Texas.

    Amanda: Don’t let the ocean waters keep you away. So far we have people coming from Canada and New Zealand. I’d love to have at least one person from every country attend.

    Registration for BDSM Writers Con 2014 opens this weekend, Sunday midnight. For the first 30-days of registration ONLY, you’ll receive an additional $75 off the early bird special. Plus, you’ll be entered to win amazing prices worth over $100. Use this link below to register: http://www.bdsmforwriters.com/BDSM_WRITERS_CON_2014.html

    Follow us on Twitter at hash tag #BDSM/WC

    I tried to create a FB group, not sure if I did it correctly. Anyway, here it is:
    https://www.facebook.com/groups/197911070384732/

    I look forward to seeing you all at next year’s BDSM WRITERS CON 2014. Where reality and fantasy…come together!

    And I’m excitedly awaiting for Cris’ next blog. Do so love hearing what she and other participants of the event had to say.

    PS: Thanks Cris for helping to spread the word. And allowing all the links above.

    Live with passion,

    Doctor Charley…

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    1. Doctor Charley, I have to thank YOU for opening my eyes to this world of BDSM. Writing about it is almost as much fun as researching it. I look forward eagerly to next year's bigger and better conference!

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  10. Cris,

    Thanks for sharing your experiences with us. I'm trying to find a way to make the 2014 conference. I so want to met everyone and gain some experience.

    Marie

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    1. I sincerely hope you're able to join us in 2014, Marie. It will be an excellent learning experience.

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